Think-Scobe | Frank Scoblete

Miami Is Another Country

In New York City you have different neighborhoods some dominated by Italians, some by Jews, some by Germans, some by Afro-Americans, some by Puerto Ricans, some by Irish, some by Indians and some by a whole combination of these and more ethnic groups. While you might hear foreign languages in many places, there are so many of them in New York that the City has true diversity – although diversity has no inherently good moral quality.

Not so with Miami.

When people call the city “little Cuba” they mean it. The U.S. Census has Miami’s Latin / Hispanic population at 70 percent (some define themselves as Hispanic white or Hispanic black), while almost 20 percent of the population is Afro-American.

About 22 percent of the population is Catholic, although a full 60 percent of the population considers itself non-religious. While the state of Florida is sometimes called “little Israel,” only a shade over one percent in Miami are Jewish. (In New York City we have a rapidly shrinking “little Italy,” a little “Chinatown,” a “little Korea,” a “little India,” a little Beirut – for the lower streets of Bay Ridge – and on it goes. Hey, in New York, you get a “little” of something or other all the time!)

Spanish seems to be the dominant language, which pleased my wife the Beautiful A.P. as she speaks Spanish. As for me, I just stand there smiling as she enjoys conversation after conversation. She could be talking to someone about his family being murdered and I stand there with a goofy grin on my face. I am sure some Miamians thought I was a total idiot.

In Miami I was in a different country, a vacation-touristy-type country, meaning a pretty Latin American or island country given the weather, the Palm trees, the ocean, the sands, the Spanish speakers and the architecture; plus all the beautiful people, those tanned men and tanned women posing in skimpy bathing suits at the beaches (particularly South Beach), or at the pools, often holding drinks in their hands as if they were in commercials.

Being there in late September was – to put it frankly – awful, absolutely awful. The temperatures hovered in the high 80’s and low 90’s, while the humidity was at steam bath levels. I sweated like crazy. Maybe that’s why so many of the beautiful people walked around almost naked. Even some of the non-beautiful people were almost naked too – not a pleasant sight.

We stayed at the Sonesta Bayfront Hotel in Coconut Grove.

https://www.sonesta.com/coconutgrove/

I had already stayed at a Sonesta in Baltimore and loved its old world, classy style. The Coconut Grove Sonesta at first seemed less appealing but by the third day I loved the place. It was clean, had a great restaurant, pool and terrific views from one’s room. Our traveling companions Jerry “Stickman” and his wife the Lovely Tres, along with the Beautiful A.P. and I would sit on our adjoining balconies, watch the sunsets, the ocean, while drinking fine wines.

Our meals went from good to great; from gourmet to not-so gourmet. The first night we ate at Bombay Darbar (http://www.bombaydarbarrestaurant.com/), an exceptional Indian restaurant. The following day we ate lunch at a good Cuban restaurant in South Beach, Puerto Sagua. https://plus.google.com/104335181789256454187/about?gl=us&hl=en

Thankfully I did not go into the men’s room at Sagua until after lunch. It was covered in graffiti – with graffiti on top of graffiti (all of it un-artistic). The stall toilet was covered in shit and someone had taken a small dump in the urinal. The place stunk. Had I gone to the bathroom before lunch I would have left the restaurant.

Prior to eating at Puerto Sagua, we toured South Beach with Art Deco Tours with Christine and Company. (http://www.artdecotours.com/) Christine is a vivacious young woman with a true love for Miami and her tour was excellent. I recommend it highly.

That night we ate at a French restaurant La Plame d’Or at the Biltmore Hotel. http://www.biltmorehotel.com/dining/palme_dor.php. Terrific gourmet with excellent ambience.

One of the reasons we went to Miami was for Stickman and me to attend a Tampa Bay Rays’ baseball game and a Miami Marlins’ baseball game. So on Sunday morning Stickman and I headed to Tampa Bay (St. Petersburg) – a four-hour trip from Miami – to watch Tampa Bay take on the Baltimore Orioles.

We had breakfast at Sonesta’s excellent Panorama restaurant and at 8am off we went. The wives would have their day in Miami; while we’d be continuing our baseball odyssey.

Going to Tampa Bay became an ordeal. Suddenly, out of nowhere (so to speak) I had to go to the bathroom; go urgently, as in the saying, “If I don’t go now I will explode in the car.”

“Jerry,” I said, holding myself in. “Pull over. I can’t hold this.” Jerry Stickman pulled over and I squatted beside the car. EXPLOSION! The road we were on went through the Everglades so there were no houses anywhere; just swamps and grasses and small trees as far as the eye could see, with a stream running beside the road. There was a big, electrified fence between the side of the road (where I squatted) and the stream. It didn’t dawn on me just then why such an electrified fence was there. EXPLOSION!

The cars coming towards us on our side of the highway could catch a glimpse of me squatting the way the Japanese squat over their floor-level toilets. EXPLOSION!

“Aaaaarrrrrggghhhhh,” I said inside myself. What could I do? Cars flashed by. (“Mommy, that man is showing his rear end.” “Timmy don’t look.” “Oh God, Sarah, he just blew a big one onto the ground!”)

As I was finishing up, I noticed it – an alligator, a BIG nasty-looking alligator, staring at me from the stream parallel to the road. Oh, my God, I was already embarrassed by the fact that I had dumped my brains out; now I would be eaten by an alligator. I could see the headlines: “Famous Writer Eaten by Alligator after Having Loose Bowel Movement on the Side of the Road!”

As I pulled my pants up, I realized now why the electrified fence had been erected – to protect humans from alligators!

Getting in the car, Stickman said, “Well, that’s a first for me!”

“I’m mortified.”

“On we go!” he said.

Ten minutes later, I said: “I gotta go again.”

“There’s a rest area coming up,” said Stickman.

We made it and I made it too. EXPLOSION!

We had to stop a third time at a gas station and I literally battled several elderly men to get into a stall. “You son of a bitch,” said one old guy I pushed aside. EXPLOSION! “Oh, man; oh, Christ,” said another man. “You smell that?” EXPLOSION!

Thankfully, the gas station had a sundry store with a mountain of Imodium piled high on the counter. Evidently I was not the only one to experience what I had been experiencing. I took two.

“I think I will be all right,” I said.

“This has been a first for me,” said Jerry again.

“I’ll never live this down.”

“Can’t wait to read what you write about this,” said Jerry Stickman.

“You crazy? I’m not writing about this.”

The Tampa Bay game was fun. Stickman bought us Diamond Club seats. You had your own private club with all sorts of food and drinks, all covered by your ticket fee. Jerry had a great time; eating and drinking and eating and drinking and eating a little fruit and a huge stack of cookies for dessert – he got his money’s worth. I ate a couple of cookies fearing anything more might start me going again. Those were the most expensive cookies I ever ate.

We got back to Miami around 8:30pm; sat on our balcony with our wives and as he poured the wine Jerry said, “Frank has a great story ladies. It was an amazing trip to Tampa Bay.”

“Oh, yeah, I really wish you could have come along,” I said. They were anxious to hear about our wonderful trip – and I told them. Their faces went from anxious to horrified. Evidently I can tell a great story.

The Beautiful A.P. and the Lovely Tres left Miami early Monday morning. Jerry Stickman and I stayed in order to go to the Miami Marlin’s game that night.

Now I must admit this. I have a small quirk in my personality. I love to go to aquariums when I visit a city. Lately, I’ve dragged Jerry to aquariums in Chicago, Memphis, Baltimore and Hawaii, among others. So today we would go to Miami’s Seaquarium. (http://miamiseaquarium.com/)

We took our wives to the airport at 5am, went back to Sonesta, finished our evening’s interrupted sleep, had breakfast and headed out to Seaquarium.

Of course, the day was brutally hot and drippingly humid. We figured the aquarium would be indoors and therefore air conditioned. That had saved us in a hot, humid Honolulu, Hawaii. We’d relax, watch the fish swim; in short, have a comfortable indoor day.

The Miami Seaquarium was outdoors.

It was not the typical aquarium with indoor rooms filled with tanks of various sizes; instead it was a world of shows. Jerry and I saw the Sea Lion Show (great fun), the Killer Whale and Dolphin Show (spectacular – and by the way, Killer Whales – also known as Orcas – are not whales but dolphins) and the Dolphin Show (disappointing). We also visited the weird looking Manatees (often thought to be mermaids – ugly as hell mermaids) and watched them eat bushels of lettuce. We saw giant sea turtles and a whole area of alligators – an animal now associated with the worst crap of my life.

It was a fun time.

Now let me tell you about Jerry “Stickman’s” quirk. He is an eater of food that I would normally avoid. He loves fast food chains (the man even eats White Castle!) and he watches shows like “Diners, Drive-ins and Dives” and “Burger Land with George Motz.” Jerry is also a world traveler. He and the Lovely Tres probably spend as much time on the road as they do at home. I think he has been to about two-thirds of the countries in the world. He’s been to every state too. One of Jerry’s favorite activities when he travels in America and Canada is to visit the recommended restaurants on those shows. Sooooo…

We went into Little Havana to eat lunch at El Rey De Las Fritas, a highly recommended restaurant where we would eat a supposedly unique Frita.

http://southflorida.menupages.com/restaurants/el-rey-de-las-fritas-2/menu

Little Havana is a sad area of Miami. Just about every house and store had safety bars on the doors and windows. Still, Jerry and I had the greatest Frita! I have never tasted a hamburger like that. So if you are in Miami check this place out. The restaurant was clean and it is in a little shopping center.

Got back to the hotel, took a nap and then headed for the Marlins’ ballgame. We were two of about 3,000 fans. Miami is not a baseball town.

That was our trip. It was a fun four-day visit (except for when I was you-know-whating).

[Read Frank Scoblete’s books I Am a Card Counter: Inside the World of Advantage-Play Blackjack, I Am a Dice Controller: Inside the World of Advantage-Play Craps and Confessions of a Wayward Catholic! All available from Amazon.com, on Kindle and electronic media, at Barnes and Noble, and at bookstores.]

What Happened to the Negro League?

This is really a sensitive – as in very sensitive – issue, and I don’t want anyone to misunderstand what and why I am writing this. It is about how a really good thing – a thing that had to be done – can also have unintended bad consequences. (The good thing outweighs the bad consequences here but the bad exists nevertheless.)

I just finished watching the movie 42 which I enjoyed. I saw Jackie Robinson play — I was really, really young — and my father had nothing but praise for the man. I remember my father saying, “It takes courage to do what he is doing.” My father was a Jackie Robinson fan. I only had a vague idea of what he was talking about.

I even had some conversations once with Roy Campanella, who was injured in a terrible automobile accident. I worked as a maintenance man in the Smith Houses in Manhattan for four summers as a high school and college student and that is where I met him. He was paralyzed and in a wheelchair. By then I knew what he and the other black pioneers had meant to major league baseball. It meant the joy of watching Willie Mays and Hank Aaron in the outfield.

“Campy” joined the Brooklyn Dodgers just after Robinson broke the color barrier.

And now for the sensitive part of this article: Whatever happened to the ball players from the Negro leagues that were not good enough to make the major leagues? What happened to the white players who were replaced by the better black players?

I know the Negro Leagues ended soon after the integration of major league baseball. I know most of their players did not make the major leagues. I know the white players who were replaced by better black players did not play in the majors once the color barrier was broken.

The good was accompanied by the end of employment for those who would have played professional baseball but were now just not talented and skilled enough to make it all the way to the new, and better, major leagues.

American baseball today has players from all over the world; South America, Mexico, Canada, Latin America, Cuba, Japan. The painting of today’s major leagues is a medley of colors and ethnic groups. The best of the best will face off against each other for 162 games.

Yes, integration was good for the quality of the game (and for our society) but it had a cost – as many good things have costs – and we must recognize that getting better does not make everyone become part of that betterment. That is why I am a firm supporter of those Negro league museums. We mustn’t forget those guys, especially the great ones who never got to the major leagues because of racism or the ones just not good enough to get there once the game opened its doors.

Is This Funny or Idiocy?

An advertisement in the latest issue of Scientific American (June 2017) has me grinding my teeth after laughing a little, well, a lot. It is an ad for the “Freedom from Religion Foundation” with Donald Trump and Mike Pence having leading roles.

Here is the copy and I’ve tried to use the ad’s type style, punctuation and grammar:

“IN REASON WE TRUST; Don’t let The Religious Right Trump The First Amendment; [Picture of Pence pushing a painting of Thomas Jefferson behind him.] The ONLY WALL We Need Is Between CHURCH And STATE; Your gift to FFRF’s Legal Fund in Mike Pence’s name will help us fight religion in our government. Phone for free copy of FFRF newspaper. Gifts deductible for income tax purposes. 1-800-335-4021 / ffrf.org/pence; FREEDOM FROM RELIGION FOUNDATION”

I have no doubt that just about all left-wingers will find this advertisement funny and might send in generous donations to the Pence fund for Freedom from Religion.

Yes, Mike Pence is a true Christian believer, heavily supporting a ban on gay marriage and wanting to make a law that defines marriage as solely between a man and a woman. He is also in favor of the religious freedom act as incorporated in Indiana for our entire nation.

What is the religious freedom act? In a nutshell it maintains that if someone enters your store and is gay and wants a wedding cake, if such gayness violates one’s religious beliefs you do not have to sell the cake to such a person. That was an actual event. The owners of the bakery would not sell an inscribed wedding cake to (I’m making the names up) Michael and Donnie.

A Kentucky clerk named Kim Davis refused to issue marriage licenses to a gay couple even though issuing such licenses was her job. When asked why she wasn’t following the Kentucky law she said to the effect, “I am following God’s law!” Republican Presidential aspirant Michael Huckabee flew down to Kentucky and was hanging all over Ms. Davis at a rally supporting her religious freedom even if it meant she wouldn’t do her job.

You can see the problem here. If an individual’s religious belief claims that a women should be dressed a certain way in order to come into his store to buy something, and the woman isn’t dressed that way, then he can tell the woman to take a hike. This is happening at an orthodox Jewish store in Brooklyn, New York.

Or if a black businessman says that his religion will not allow him to sell anything to whites then that is okay too. Or whites selling to blacks. Or Indians selling to Pakistanis. Or…on and on.

The right wing is in favor of religion being a part of government. They protest when the 10 Commandments are removed from court houses. They want civil government to be able to officially decorate for Christmas. I understand this too – hell, I love Christmas but I agree that Christmas and official government decorating for it is not the best practice.

So by using Trump and Pence as examples of the kinds of people who want to shove their religion down our throats the foundation thinks it has made the point. (I actually don’t know if Trump is religious but he now talks as if he is, so if the words fit he should wear them.)

Except –

The Freedom from Religion Foundation just zinged half their potential donors! Can’t someone who wants a wall between Mexico and the United States also want freedom from religion? They sure can. But the ad has now labeled them as retrogrades. Why donate money to a group that disdains you?

I am sure that Republicans and independents who voted for Trump and Pence would be less interested in supporting the Freedom from Religion Foundation than leftists. But some of them just might. I would guess that a percentage of Trump and Pence voters might even be atheists or otherwise opposed to mixing religion with government.

Making fun of their former candidates Trump and Pence is stupid; yes, it is total idiocy – funny idiocy at that but idiocy nevertheless. The “freedom from religion” cause is a serious one, calling for rational thought, as opposed to satire.

Supergirl Defeats Superman? Are You Crazy?

I do not mind a little political correctness in my life. Heck, I always say my granddaughter is intelligent and beautiful (she is both) but I make sure the order is intelligent first and beautiful second. If she was stupid and ugly I don’t know what I’d say, maybe “You don’t look so bad for a beast.”

But I am now totally irritated by the television show Supergirl. I am a big superhero fan, I used to write for the comic books, but trampling on the obvious to give us the politically correct is an assault on common sense, nature and superhero lore.

Yes, Supergirl is politically correct in a Romeo and Juliet way. It’s all dangerous love liaisons defying convention (or at least the writers think so): Supergirl (whose Kryptonian name is Kara Zor-El) loves Mon-El an alien from the planet Daxam, a world that was at war for centuries with Supergirl’s now-destroyed home world of Krypton. Their love is a dangerous liaison as Mon-El’s vicious, murderous mother Rhea wants Supergirl dead in order to force Mon-El’s return to Daxam.

[You will note that the names of Supergirl, Kara Zor-El, and Mon-El use the “El” at the end. Superman is Kal-El. For those not too familiar with the bible’s book of Genesis, the word El is a synonym for the God created by the Canaanites but in Genesis it is used in the plural as Elohim. Considering the amazing powers these individuals have on Earth these names seem appropriate. Obviously, Jerry Siegel, the original creator of Superman, knew his scripture!]

But we have other cases of dangerous liaisons. J’onn J’onnz (pronounced John Jones) is a green Martian able to transform his body to look as if he were human. His love is for a white Martian, a member of the group that slaughtered almost all his fellow green Martians in a titanic war on Mars. Still J’onnz, who is the head of the DEO (Department of Extranormal Operations), can’t shake his dangerous love for white Martian M’gann M’orzz.

Winslow, the head computer geek, is in love with an alien nutcase. Cross species love can be a dangerous thing as his love tries to kill him several times before becoming somewhat tame.

The big dangerous liaison (in the writers’ minds) is between Supergirl’s adopted sister Alex Danvers, a DEO agent, and Maggie Sawyer, a detective. This lesbian relationship is a major shout-out for political correctness and it seems these two may get married in the upcoming season. I’ve got no problem with that at all even though a lot of time is wasted exploring their love when we’d like some more action. (The special effects are great in this show.)

But Supergirl went over the cliff in the season finale. She defeated Superman (Kal-El) in a pitched battle. How could that be?

Granted Supergirl can defeat just about all male and female superheroes and just about all villains – but defeating Superman? That’s idiotic.

Given a normal Kryptonian woman and a normal Kryptonian man, the man has greater muscle power, greater speed and is generally bigger and more agile. This tends to hold true on Earth with men and women as well.

Supergirl is no monstrous Hulk; she looks perfectly normal and in relation to Superman, she fits the woman to man ratio. Her strength and agility could not be as great as her cousin Superman. Just multiply by a thousand percent their Kryptonian bodies and the body that was stronger would still be stronger.

I will grant that in terms of their heat-vision and X-ray vision equality might be achieved but their super breath? Superman would win here as well.

Superman would defeat Supergirl in a fair fight and the fight in the finale was a fair fight. There is no question about that. So why did this politically correct show go over the edge in the season’s finale?

In the finale Superman becomes a kind of unneeded appendage; a pathetic figure in the background of the show. Why have him in at all? Why strip the first and greatest comic-book hero in order to worship at the altar of political correctness?

Writers can only push the envelope so far before it bursts. The season finale burst Supergirl big time.

The Best Science Fiction Movies

These are the best science fiction movies I have seen. I did not put in the Big or Gigantic Monsters as they have their own category. Also zombies and vampires go it alone. I also could not rate them in order. I just have two categories — the best of the best and almost the best of the best. Some movies such as Frankenstein are in Horror Movies; Superman in Comic Book Movies.

THE BEST OF THE BEST

The Day the Earth Stood Still (1951): A peaceful alien comes to Earth to warn us about our warlike ways. The first thing that happens to him? He gets shot. His robot returns the fire. Great film with a great message from the 1950’s – we better watch out.

The Thing from Another World (usually called “The Thing”) (1951): This movie turns up the heat and the suspense to the highest level. Brilliant overlapping dialogue, as good as you’ll ever see in a movie of any type. The “Thing” has landed in the North Pole and is hungry and fixated on reproducing. Only a team of soldiers and scientists stand in this creature’s way. Scary as all get out. Wow!

Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1956): The original and still the best of a half dozen attempts to duplicate it. They are here; they are taking over a small town, and then the planet and they might have already taken the shape of your relatives and friends. Another knockout movie. I was a kid when I saw this movie and couldn’t sleep in the dark for a couple of months. Were my parents really my parents?

Planet of the Apes (1968): Oh, yeah, our close relatives rule “some planet” on which an American astronaut crash lands. The apes hunt humans on this planet, experiment on them. Sadly, the humans on this planet are mute. Our hero played by Charlton Heston is not. Great cautionary tale. Where is that planet?

Close Encounters of the Third Kind (1976): More aliens are coming to earth, this time they are friendly. Try to rent or buy the extended version as Richard Dreyfuss gives a great performance of someone obsessed with meeting them.

Star Wars (1976): Terrific space opera. I am sure just about everyone has seen it. The characters have become almost iconic, even the robotic ones. “Use the Force, Luke.”

Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978): Great retelling of the original tale but lacks the magic and absolute terror of the first. Still a really fun and scary movie.

Alien (1979): “In space no one can hear you scream!” That was the advertisement and people in the movie and in the audience screamed. Great cast trapped with that horrible creature looking to devour them.

Time After Time (1979): Jack the Ripper time travels to the 20^th Century. He checks out the television news showing scenes of war and carnage and says, “I am home!” He is followed by H.G. Wells. Can Wells stop the murderous Jack the Ripper? Wonderful time travel movie.

Altered States (1980): Take some mind altering drugs; go into a sensory deprivation tank and see what happens. Discover what it (meaning life, the universe, everything) all means. You’ll go ape!

The Empire Strikes Back (1980): Even better than Star Wars with deep, dark resonance. Whatever you do don’t watch Lucas’ relative new Star Wars prequels because all of the suspense of this one is ruined by those.

Blade Runner (1982): AI “humans” are coming to get us. Fun all the way.

E.T.: The Extraterrestrial (1982): Nice alien. Nice kid. Nice movie.

Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan (1982): Oh, yeah, Khan returns and he is pissed off and determined to kill Captain Kirk. Great acting, great battles.

The Thing (1982): Good reimagining of the original movie. Not as good; not as scary but still one of the top science fiction movies of all time.

Starman (1984): E.T. for adults. Strong movie about an alien (Jeff Bridges) on Earth looking to get home.

The Terminator (1984): “I’ll be back.” Oh, yes, he certainly will. The machines of the future try to save themselves by sending a killing machine (Arnold Schwarzenegger) into the past to kill the mother of the human resistance, Sarah Connor, before her son, John Connor, can be born.

Back to the Future I, II, III (1985, 1989 and 1990): Each one is superb. Rarely do you watch a trilogy where each movie is absolutely great. Time travel at its best. Michael J. Fox and Christopher Lloyd delight.

Aliens (1986): The original Alien was a horror movie in space. This one is an Indiana Jones type of movie. Non-stop action when the action gets going. Great female heroine played by Sigourney Weaver.

The Fly (1986): Surpasses the original Fly and really shows how a man can become a fly. I hate bugs! But Jeff Goldblum as the Fly is totally great and truly disgusting.

Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home (1986): A great time travel movie as the crew of the Enterprise goes back in time to San Francisco. Right up there with the Wrath of Khan.

Terminator II: Judgment Day (1991): Now the bad Terminator of the first movie has become the good Terminator and a shape shifting new Terminator is sent back to kill John Connor, who is now an annoying teenager played by an annoying actor. Still, it is a great movie.

Groundhog Day (1993): A truly great movie about a day – the same day! – in the life of one man.

Twelve Monkeys (1995): A fabulous time travel movie with Bruce Willis and Brad Pitt. Intense all the way, surprising, with terrific performances. Go with it.

Face Off (1997): A good guy exchanges faces with a bad guy. The bad guy exchanges faces with a good guy. Both step into the other’s life. It is brutal, action-packed with an amazingly wonderful ending at a funeral. John Travolta versus Nicholas Cage in a battle at the finish to the finish.

Galaxy Quest (1999): Satires are tough to pull off. This is pulled off with aplomb. Think of the Star Trek actors being lampooned but at the same time there is excitement and fun all the way. You don’t even have to know anything about Star Trek because the movie works on its own.

Signs (2002): Great movie about aliens landing on someone’s farm – but also landing all over the world. We see a small battle between one man and his small family against them. Can a former minister who has lost faith in God defeat these creatures on his property? Excellent theme underlying the entire movie. Great performances by Mel Gibson and Joaquin Phoenix.

Serenity (2005): One of the greatest television shows Firefly continued as a movie. Loved the show and loved this movie. As Sheldon Cooper said, “I can’t believe Fox cancelled this show after one season.” I can’t either. Movie is terrific by the way. Joss Whedon at his best.

War of the Worlds (2005): I like Tom Cruise and he is excellent in this telling of H.G. Wells’ tale about a Martian invasion of Earth. Dakota Fanning is also magnificent as his daughter.

Star Trek (2009): The reboot that scared me. How could you have other actors playing iconic characters from the first series? Turned out to be a fabulous film. The actors caught the essence of Kirk, Spock and McCoy. Never thought this movie would work. Boy was I wrong.

Rise of the Planet of the Apes (2011): This should start a series. Excellent story, even pays homage to Planet of the Apes. Well done all around.

THE GOOD ONES

The Invisible Man (1933)

The Bride of Frankenstein (1935)

Creature from the Black Lagoon (1954)

This Island Earth (1955)

1984 (1956)

Forbidden Planet (1956)

The Fly (1958)

The Incredible Shrinking Man (1957)

On the Beach (1959)

The Time Machine (1960)

Fahrenheit 451 (1966)

2001: A Space Odyssey (1968)

The Andromeda Strain (1971)

The Omega Man (1971)

Slaughter House Five (1972)

Sleeper (1973)

Soylent Green (1973)

Westworld (1973)

The Stepford Wives (1975)

The Boys from Brazil (1978)

Somewhere in Time (1980)

Scanners (1981)

The Dead Zone (1983)

Return of the Jedi (1983)

Dreamscape (1984)

Star Trek III: The Search for Spock (1984)

Brazil (1985)

Cocoon (1985)

Predator (1987)

The Blob (1988)

Big (1988)

The Abyss (1989)

Predator II (1990)

Total Recall (1990)

Demolition Man (1993)

Fire in the Sky (1993)

Village of the Damned (1995)

Independence Day (1996)

Men in Black (1997)

Starship Troopers (1997)

The Truman Show (1998)

Matrix (1999)

A.I.: Artificial Intelligence (2001)

Men in Black II (2002)

Minority Report (2002)

Terminator III: Rise of the Machines (2003)

The Day after Tomorrow (2004)

District 13 (2004)

I, Robot (2004)

I Am Legend (2007)

Avatar (2009)

Terminator Salvation (2009)

The Time Traveler’s Wife (2009)

Real Steel (2011)

The Hunger Games (2012)

Men in Black III (2012)

Looper (2012)

Gravity (2013)

Live, Die, Repeat (2014)

The Martian (2015)

Ex Machina (2015)

Major Disappointments: All the “Next Generation Star Trek” movies. While none was bad they just didn’t have “it.” Terminator III was a decent movie but a replay of Terminator II with a female shape-shifting Terminator.

All three of George Lucas’ new Star Wars films (The Phantom Menace, Attack of the Clones and Revenge of the Sith) should never have been made. These also ruin the suspense and surprises of the original trilogy, the first two of which Star Wars and The Empire Strikes Back were brilliant and the third (Return of the Jedi) was good.

Prometheus is the prequel to the Alien series — it stunk. I was hoping the characters would die. Alien III was even worse. Seriously, who cares about vicious prisoners? Let the damn alien eat them. I could not believe they killed off Newt just like that when we spent almost three hours cringing when her life was in jeopardy in Aliens. Killing her was a disgrace. And Ripley’s death scene? Ludicrous, pretentious, poorly conceived. Alien Resurrection was idiotic but still tops Alien III.

Alien versus Predator had some good moments but is not one of the top science fiction movies. Nor are the other two predators versus aliens movies worth watching — but compared to the three new Star Wars clunkers these could be considered Gone with the Wind.

Evolution had a good premise but someone should have awakened David Duchovny and explained to him that he had to act, not nap, during his scenes.

All the X-Files movies missed the boat or the space craft or whatever the hell they needed to rev these pictures up.

Arrival has Amy Adams in it. That’s the best thing about this bomb that tries to be sophisticated and winds up just silly.

The Wizard of Oz is a totally overrated movie. I didn’t even like it when I was a kid. I think I’ll get some criticism but the movie should go back to Kansas and never leave.

NOTE: I will let you know what I think of the new movies after I see them. I tend to wait for them to come out on Blu-Ray and I watch them in my home theater. My sound system and television are better than the movies and I can stop everything, go to the bathroom, get more popcorn and pick up the movie where I left off. I only have a small problem; my wife telling me, “Turn down the sound, Scobe, you are going to kill our parrots!”

Abortion and Dogs

I used to love dogs. I really did. I didn’t love dogs the way some people on Facebook love them. Maybe these dog-lovers were dogs in their past lives, if past lives make any sense whatsoever in the big scheme of things.

I see people showing pictures on Facebook of them kissing and cuddling and curling up with their dogs, and also writing ecstatic words of love to their furry little and big friends. I do not knock their deep and abiding love for these creatures, even those weird little Chihuahuas that (hard though it is to believe) we created from noble wolves. If dog lovers love “Butch,” or “Whimpy Woodle,” or “Peggy Pugnose,” hey, that’s their thing. The fact that some dog-lovers actually sleep with these carnivores is somewhat strange don’t you think?

I had a great dog, Sam, a Golden Retriever, who was mild-mannered, relaxed, loving and gentle (she had to be gentle since my two little boys –played really rough with her). I have to say I had really fond feelings towards that animal. If there is reincarnation Sam is now a person whose picture is on Facebook cuddling her dog.

But something changed in me over the years. My tolerance level for a dog’s stench, their drool, their constant slobbering just became too much. And it all became summed up in a dog called Cheney, my son and daughter-in-law’s attempt to have a pet before they had the ultimate responsibility – two beautiful children.

Since both of them worked, Cheney was brought up by himself. He was a huge Golden Retriever, weighing close to 100 pounds. He was largely unschooled. He smelled like crap mixed with bad breath and a hint of death. Unfortunately, he also thought of himself as a lap dog. He’d leap on you if you sat on the couch; his ass in your face and his tail wagging against your cheeks as if he was slapping you. Man, you needed a gas mask to survive the odor.

At dinner, the beast would hide under the table and if you turned your head to talk to someone his tongue lashed out like a lightning bolt to suck up whatever you left unprotected on your plate. (“Hey, what the hell happened to my steak?”) His tongue was like those frog’s tongues that shoot out about a yard to catch some poor flying insect.

Cheney was not fun to be around. His farts were awful. They could depopulate a native village.

Cheney put the finishing touches on my love of dogs. Now I just tolerate them – and, to be honest, I often can’t stand them. I do not, however, wish them any harm nor do I wish their human lovers any harm either.

And that’s why I just don’t understand dog lovers who are pro-abortion or, as they call it, pro-choice. They love these smelling, drooling, slobbering beasts but babies don’t connect with them. I write this because a ferocious dog lover I know is a leader in the pro-abortion movement. It is almost like a religion with her; a religion only surpassed by her love for her dogs – a smelly lot. Her pictures of her dogs are all over the Internet too. She even does dog rescue. In her mind humans were created in the image and likeness of the divine being – Dog. (God spelled backwards.)

I am not saying that the dog lovers who are pro-abortion do not love babies that have finally struggled out of the womb; many do love the little imps and many more tolerate them despite the fact that the little lovelies poop and spit up and drool and burp and fart, just like their dogs. But for some weird reason when a baby is inside a womb, they make all manner of silly excuses to remove the kid’s humanity from him or her. That allows them to kill the little one with lack of conscience.

I read a long (intolerably long) essay by some lawyer (not my cousin Maria or Margaret) expounding on all the reasons why a fetus was not a human being. Essentially it all boiled down to not being out of the womb or able to live on its own. (I don’t know one infant who is able to live on his own, do you? Even a new born dog can’t live on its own.)

The need to strip a human of his/her human qualities allows us to kill that human with no stirrings of our conscience. I understand that. I also understand the need for us to so label those we wish to kill. Jews were defined as less than human by Nazi’s, so why not kill them? They are annoying vermin and many of them are communists, more vermin, so exterminate them and goosestep into the future to create the fourth Reich. You can make a list of all the people throughout history who were defined as non-people which then gave the “real” people the right to kill them.

There is no doubt that societies determine who can be put to death. A society that defines who can be put to death defines that death as “not murder,” just killing. The Catholic Church which now sanctimoniously opposes the death penalty had a blast putting witches and heretics to death throughout the middle ages.

The laws of Moses prescribe the death penalty for a ton of infractions. (Most people are not aware of this fact.) Indeed, the commandment is “Thou Shalt Not Murder,” not “Thou shalt not kill.” How could it be otherwise when in later laws the death penalty is given for various offenses? The death penalty is killing. All the wars Yahweh engaged in were killing. Ask the Egyptians if killing of their first born was killing. I think they would answer yes. But killing is not murder.

That is essentially the argument of pro-abortionists. A fetus is not a human in the human sense as we define humanity now. It can be killed. Society states that the killing of such a fetus is not murder. I do not agree with diminishing the humanity of a child inside a womb. I realize we are allowed to kill it but I prefer giving the little thing the benefit of being a person and not some vermin.

Our society in the form of the Supreme Court says that killing a baby in the womb is just fine; it is not murder. If a woman needs to get an abortion then she can get one. But please do not try to pretend it is just killing some cells or other. You are killing a human being. You are allowed to do that in our society, which is absolutely true, but don’t give the song and dance that the baby is just something of an “other” as opposed to a human because it is not crying, crapping and flopping outside the womb.

In short, I believe we should recognize the humanity of a baby in the womb. Pretending otherwise is just pretend. Early on the lawyer who wrote the interminably long article used the number of cells in the baby to define what a human was; then he went to lack of full brain development (hey, we don’t get our adult brains until 25 years of age – or so – and that’s why teenagers are so maddening); and then he used the “in or out of the womb” treatise. The guy was all over the place in his effort to dehumanize the baby so we could be comfortable killing it.

Why bother to do any of that? Just say that in our society we can kill babies in the womb and be done with it. Let’s not do what other societies have done and fall back on the primitive but seemingly lasting idea that those we can kill are somehow less than the rest of us; in short those we can’t kill because they are not less than us. I prefer reality to illusion in the case of abortion. I prefer it in the case of the death penalty too. A criminal we decide to kill is not being murdered by us, just killed. He’s still a person.

I prefer an honest discussion of the abortion issue without the flim flam of attempts to create definitions that lack substance. We have the right to kill that baby, fine; just don’t say it isn’t a human being.

And give your slobbering, smelly pooch a hug for me.

[Read Frank’s book Confessions of a Wayward Catholic! Available on Amazon.com, on Kindle and other electronic media, Barnes and Noble, and at bookstores.]

The Resurrection of Jesus

The most important holiday in Christianity concerns the resurrection of Jesus from the tomb; this holiday is now known as Easter. Tales of this miraculous event set Christianity on a path of total religious domination in the Western world.

Christianity is still the largest religion in the whole wide world, even though the fecund followers of Islam are quickly catching up.

Ancient literature is filled with gods and humans who rose from the dead, those humans often becoming immortal. Any study of mythology will find ancient texts littered with the walking dead. Jesus, of course, is worshipped by many Christians and thus his rise from the dead fits both of those ancient patterns—Jesus is both a god and an immortal man.

Christian apologists—experts at defending their beliefs—call the ancient pagan resurrection myths a foreshadowing of Jesus. Those myths are not true but Jesus’s resurrection is true.

Certainly Christmas as practiced by us in the West is considered the celebration of the birth of Christ; yet Easter is the pivotal event in Christianity. If Christians did not believe that Christ rose from the dead there would be no Christians at all.

Christianity was (and is) an adaptable religion and, yes, many of its holidays have been drafted from other sources. There is a good chance that the life of the Roman god Mithras played a singular role in determining the birth date given to Jesus.

Easter Sunday – although pictured as a fun time of rutting bunny rabbits and eggs of various types – deals with a serious issue, a man/god coming back from the dead. One can speculate that bunnies and eggs represent renewed life in the spring and that Christianity adopted and adapted these images for its celebration of the continued life of their resurrected Lord.

The belief of many Christians is that the words and stories in the New Testament are factual, historical events, meaning such tales are absolutely true.

Jesus did in fact resurrect individuals in the Gospel stories, including Jairus’s daughter and Lazarus.

But now I am also looking for an answer from religious folks to this quandary in which I find myself. When Jesus died, hundreds, if not thousands, of people rose from their graves as well. This is clearly stated in the New Testament. (Check out the end of the Gospel of Matthew.) The Roman Empire may have been literally littered with those who had formerly been dead.

So where did all these dead, but now mobile people go? Were they alive as those of you reading this are alive, or were they just the undead? Were there legions of rotted corpses that had dug their respective ways out of the ground and the tombs staggering through ancient Roman cities? In fact, were the dead conscious or just reanimated bodies? Did they re-die in the future? If so, when? If not, where are they now?

I enjoy the ancient myths of the risen gods and humans but the New Testament is giving us some awesome events that modern religious folks believe are true and such folks should therefore have some reasonable answers for what troubles me.

Are these tales true? Did all those dead people come back? If so, what happened to them?

[Enjoy Frank’s book Confessions of a Wayward Catholic! Available from Amazon.com, on Kindle and other electronic media, at Barnes and Noble, and at bookstores.]

Life After Death

What if it were proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that there was a life after death; that our consciousness definitely survives the Grim Reaper? What if this were proven scientifically, with no need for a mythical belief system as is found in most religions or esoteric philosophies?

In the past there have been supposed scientific studies that purport to show that life after death is real. These studies – each and every one I have read – are flawed, often verging on the level of absolute nonsense. Some people have confused “astral travelling” or “out-of-the-body experiences” with proof that there is a soul and that it survives death. That’s way too much of a jump. I wrote an entire section of my book The Virgin Kiss for my out-of-the-body experiences.

One radio-show host was very upset with me when I told him that my out-of-the-body experiences had nothing to do with an afterlife; that I didn’t know what they had to do with, but proof of a soul they were not.

Although, religious folks are sure of an afterlife, they can offer only individual spiritual experiences which are impossible to subject to rigorous study and testing.

So, let’s imagine a time when science proves life after death. This generates more questions than it does answers.

What impact would such news have on the world?

A recent Netflix movie, The Discovery, takes up this idea. A scientist has proven that life after death exists. The result? Massive numbers of suicides of people wanting to go to the “other side.”

Would such a thing happen?

Would more people become less concerned with their individual lives and participate in more dangerous activities, knowing that they cannot be extinguished by death?

Would there be more or fewer wars?

Would more religious cults spring up and revolve around this scientific proof?

What about our furry friends? Our dogs, cats; how about our reptiles—even disgusting insects? What if science proves their existences beyond death?

So what do you think would happen with proof of a life after death?

[Read Frank Scoblete’s Confessions of a Wayward Catholic and The Virgin Kiss. Both available from Amazon.com, on Kindle and other electronic media, at Barnes and Noble, and at bookstores.]

Annoyances

I have become somewhat grumpy as I await my 70^th birthday; in fact, my wife sometimes calls me “grumpy grandpa.”

When I was a teacher I was rarely grumpy, especially with students who would take things to heart if a teacher said grumpy things. “Timmy, you and your whole family should be shot into space without oxygen.” Timmy would never forgive me for saying such a nasty thing even if Timmy and his whole family actually should be shot into space – or just shot.

As many of you know when men get older they produce more estrogen, known as the “woman’s hormone,” and that’s why you tend to see older men cry a lot more than younger men who are filled with testosterone, the male hormone. Maybe grumpiness is the product of the increase of estrogen in my body.

Older women on the other hand start to lose estrogen and increase their levels of testosterone. They become more manlike in their behavior and men become more womanlike. So when a woman becomes an “old battleax,” her bite is just as bad as her bark. And many older women do bark a lot.

Okay, yes, I am right now in my grumpy grandpa mood because I have been thinking about a two things that annoy me. These are definitely on a par with structuring an affordable health care plan for all American citizens, stopping terrorists and creating lasting peace in the Middle East.

I hate it when waiters refill your coffee into the cup from which you are drinking. Then the careful work you put in trying to make the coffee palatable is now ruined. What do you do with all this new coffee? Add how much more sugar? Add how much more cream?

Second, I hate to see diners gobbling down bread before their meals. I freely admit that my staggering weight gain is due to an overactive fork. I enjoy the gourmet experience; just look at me now. I used to be a leading man when I was an actor; I was slim, strong, well-built but now I would have to audition for roles such as Jumbo the Elephant.

If you shove loaves of bread down your throat before a gourmet meal, you are satisfying your hunger but you are eating cheap stuff when an artist is working his or her butt off in the kitchen to prepare a delicious meal for you. Then the meal –usually a work of art – and the diner can hardly fit most of it in his or her stomach.

My rule, the grumpy grandpa bread rule, says, “Do not eat bread before a meal.” If you are still hungry after the meal then have some bread.

Okay, I had to get those two issues off my chest. When I am not feeling grumpy I promise to work on the real issues that humankind is facing such as wasting sugar by putting it on pancakes.

[Read Frank’s new book Confessions of a Wayward Catholic! Available from Amazon.com, Kindle and electronic media, Barnes and Noble, and at bookstores.]

Teaching Grandchildren through Film

I am a firm believer that film can teach important lessons to kids and that’s why my wife, the Beautiful AP, and I love to show movies to our two grandkids, John is 11 and Danielle is nine.

Let me say first that my wife was an extraordinary teacher and I value her insightful expertise on anything to do with educating kids. I am with due modesty one of the greatest teachers who ever lived. So the two of us know what we’re doing.

We show our grandkids movies we think will educate them in the best of all possible ways.

Take the film Heat starring two of our favorite actresses Sandra Bullock and Melissa McCarthy. Even though it was rated a solid “R” our grandkids understood the plot of this movie and seriously loved this flick, as Melissa McCarthy was a boiling comedic swamp of a character that cursed, swore and used all manner of crude language. The sexual innuendos flew fast and furious. The grandkids loved it.

“This is such a funny film,” said Grand AP, my wife.

“Oh, yes,” I said. “I agree completely.”

“John,” asked Grand AP. “What do you think of this film?”

“Well, I find that it has great cursing and vile language. It’s everything my father and mother are preventing me from seeing except I watch stuff on the Internet when I am at my friends’ houses,” John opined.

“I think it’s funny. The fat lady is really funny when she curses,” said the nine-year- old.

I could see that this movie was having a profound effect on them.

“Just do me a favor,” I said to them. “Don’t tell your parents what we’re showing you; they might not understand, okay?”

“You got it,” said John laughing at the latest disgusting quip by McCarthy.

“No problem,” said Danielle. “I like ‘R’ rated movies like this one. Our parents won’t let us watch any of these.”

The Beautiful AP and I smiled; our grandkids were learning an important lesson as we babysat them this night. Film can be fun…and educational.

Of course, John has a habit of not being able to keep a secret while Danielle is like a locked box; you have to pry stuff out of her.

As soon as Greg, our son, and Dawn, our daughter-in-law came home, John rushed over to them. “Dad, Mom, Grandpa Scobe and Grand AP showed us an ‘R’ rated movie! It was great.”

“Really?” said Greg looking at me.

“Danielle did you like the movie?” asked Dawn.

Danielle remained mute. (That’s my girl!)

“What movie did they see?” asked Greg.

“A very educational one,” I said.

“Very educational,” said the Beautiful AP.

“With a lot of cursing,” added John.

I wonder why we haven’t gotten many calls to babysit lately.

[Read Frank Scoblete’s book Confessions of a Wayward Catholic. Available from Amazon.com, kindle, Barnes and Noble, and at bookstores.]